Twilight

I saw Twilight the other day. It gets a bad rep, but I like it. I certainly see its appeal. It's rooted in time-honored lessons for human females, such as these:

If a man says he could kill you, he's the one.

If it seems like someone is never gonna love you, they will. Keep trying.

Some vampires are bad.

Sex = DANGER, not fun, so feel bad about wanting it.

Women cause sex.

If there are trees around, look closely, because there are often people hiding behind them waiting to have a conversation.

No one understands you.

The violent guy understands you.

It's cool when a guy sneaks into your room and spies on you sleeping.

Teenage emotion powers crystal-clear decision-making.

Give mysterious strangers a really, really good chance.

Sex with an icy weiner? Yes, you do want it.

If one guy wants to hurt you, find a more violent guy.

You can play baseball in the rain.

Jeep - the outdoorsman's vehicle.