Calling Off Work

I don't get it. Why would humans ever go to work when they can just call off? It's so easy! You just call in and say, "Hey this is Ron Humanton, and I am not feeling well enough to do your menial, boring tasks today." Simple! I can't believe humans don't do this all the time. Idiots.

I think I'll be calling off for quite some time. I don't need to go to work as long as I keep getting my paychecks.